The Hoax of Humanity
I added a bounce to my step as I sauntered down the great marble hall. It was packed with gods rushing from booth to booth. Investments were made, influence was swayed. Millennium Day was always busy.
At the start of each millennium, the great billboards release the top million most valued races in the universe. In the weeks leading up to Millennium Day, gods of every kind imaginable would try to sway races to their favour and have them do their bidding. If their races advanced in the rankings, they themselves would rise in power too.
The bustling atmosphere of chaos filled the grand chamber. It was the kind of chaos that you can learn to appreciate. If you watch it closely enough. The struggle for power was eternal, but why struggle when you can cheat?
I, the Great Trickster, simply play tricks on other gods. I gain no quantifiable power per se, but as each of my tricks plays out, my reputation grows. I usually have a decent trick every couple thousand years causing various gods to be wary, but the fame never lasts long.
It’s hard work making a good con. You wouldn’t think it until you saw the process behind each ploy though. I tapped my foot on the white panned marble floor and grinned. Oh, but this trick… this trick would throw them into fits of rage and panic for centuries to come.
The Last Laugh? The Great Reveal? I mused thinking of what to name the ruse. The Hoax of Humanity, that sounds nice.
The hard part about this illusion wasn’t in the trick itself, but the waiting. Eons and eons ago, I thought it would be funny to isolate a race from the rest of the universe.
I used what little magic I had and sent Humanity to a far corner of the universe. Placing a barrier around their solar system prevented communication with anything outside of it. No prayers could reach the gods. No exchanges could reach other civilisations.
The moment they conceived the technology to escape their little bubble, however, they would be right in the midst of this game the gods play. They would be equal to every other race out there.
While the gods did what they could to leave their legacy and imprint their mark in the universe, humans were untouchable. And the best part of all: No one even knew they existed. There had been a couple inquiries long ago, but they always made their way to me, who of course played them off as a fraud.
A loud bell pierced the bustling of the crowds. Silence. A second bell. A third bell. It was time. Every god in the high chamber began their walk to the Theatre. That was where it would all take place. The declarations of which race would dominate the next thousand years. The transcendent billboards, stuffed with lists and lists of species from top to bottom.
I chuckled barely able to contain myself. Oh, what a sight it would be when every face in the Theatre drops silent with disbelief. The raised eyebrows questioning, the glint in the eyes as they realise the fools they’ve been played for.
Humanity had just discovered light travel and without a single god to guide them on their journey since the beginning of time, they would be limitless. With no god to tell them where to go or what to do, they’d be free to reign supreme.
The little rascals were probably escaping the solar system as I walked. All their tech, imagined by themselves, undiscovered by gods. I reached the towering wooden doors to the Theatre giddy with excitement. Let the fun begin.
617 words
May 08, 2020
all-stories